Warning: Turning Red Spoilers Ahead!
This week? Who wants to talk about what happened this week? Hahahaha not I! (Where would I even start? The capital D Drama at work or the tense convos with some extended fam? Or perhaps my early morning trip to the ER yesterday?) Well, maybe I do want to talk about it, but… not right now. Right now, it’s time for me to sit back and relax, to ignore the sink of yet-to-be-cleaned bottles and the mountain of toy cars and other gadgets my son got at his birthday party on Saturday. And what better way to get myself out of a weird headspace than to watch one of my favorite movies with that magical Disney logo at the beginning telling me everything is gonna be alright?
A Gabby Summary (aka the most detailed summary ya ever did see)
13-year-old Meilin Lee, this story’s main protagonist, opens the movie in early 2000’s Toronto, Canada talking of her closeness with her mother and the importance of honoring your parents. She goes on to warn the audience that honoring your parents may mean you forget to honor yourself, but she claims not to have that problem.
After a brief, hilarious overview of her life as an overachieving “dork narc” as some might say, we are introduced to her tight-knit group of friends: loyal Miriam, emo Priya, and enthusiastic Abby. Even though Mei wants to join her friends in ogling at boys and singing along to their all-time favorite boy band 4*Town, she needs to help her mom clean their family’s temple, as she does every day.
When we are introduced to her parents Ming & Jin Lee, we find out a lot more about her family’s dynamic and how overprotective her mother is. Female family members demand respect and obedience, perfection is expected— no— required, and there is an immediate rejection of Mei’s interests that her mother Ming doesn’t personally share (like her interest in 4*Town or her choice of friends).
We see Mei in her room studying, dreaming about boys, and then indulging in her “sexy thoughts” by drawing photos of her and the cute clerk at the Daisy Mart. In this awakening of sorts, she fills a whole notebook with drawings, only for her mother to find it by invading her privacy. Ming then embarrasses Mei publicly, using the drawings as evidence to accuse the teenage clerk of taking advantage of her daughter.
This traumatic experience triggers a transformation in Mei’s sleep and she wakes up to find that she is now a giant red panda. She quickly realizes she changes into her panda form when she is feeling big emotions, so she tries to move through her day without feeling things— without much success. Her mother triggers her transformation once again when she shows up at Mei’s school yelling that she forgot to bring her pads. Filled with embarrassment and fear, Panda Mei runs home crying, destroying parts of buildings and causing car wrecks in her hysteria.
To Mei’s complete shock, she learns that all of the women in her family have passed down this special ability to transform into giant red pandas for generations. Ming goes on to warn Mei that she only has one chance to successfully banish the panda or she will never be free of its darkness.
“What was a blessing became… an inconvenience.” — Ming Lee
The next morning, Mei’s besties show up to support her, with pads and news of 4*Town coming to Toronto. Even after revealing her panda form, her friends fully accept her, hype her up, and act as a safe place to process her big emotions. When they assure her they love her no matter what, “panda or no panda,” she transforms back into her human form, realizing that the support of her friends neutralizes her emotions. After this realization, the girls form a plan to ask their parents for permission to see 4*Town in concert.
After passing the calming tests to prove she could control the panda, Mei presents her parents with her concert plea. When her detailed presentation is met with immediate rejection, Mei realizes her good works don’t earn her any freedom or trust from her mother. When transforming into a panda for fun, she is seen by other girls at school, who don’t reject her at all. They absolutely love the panda! Now motivated and inspired, Mei proposes a new plan to her friends: secretly hustle the panda to earn the money needed for her and her friends to buy tickets to see 4*Town.
Their plan is going great, until they hit a plateau short of their goal. So when the annoying, constantly-teasing Tyler offers them a gig at his birthday party that will put them over their targeted amount, they agree to the terms. However, before she can sneak out to the party, Mei’s grandmother and aunties make their big appearance, ready to dote on Mei before the ritual to extract her panda spirit. Her grandmother, who is extremely intimidating and cold, immediately learns of Mei’s panda secret and confronts her. She shares how the panda was the reason she was no longer close to Ming and that even if letting the panda out felt freeing and good, it was simply too dangerous to continue.
“You are your mother’s whole world, Mei-Mei. I know you’ll do what’s right.” — Mei’s Grandmother
Mei is able to get to the party late and doesn’t want to let her friends down, so she transforms “one last time” at Tyler’s birthday party. The girls share an awesome moment on Tyler’s roof where they tell Mei they don’t want her to give up the panda in the ritual because they love that part of her. And for a moment, everything is great…until the radio lets them know they had gotten the date wrong: the concert was going to be on the same night as the ritual! This news launches Mei into an extremely heightened emotional state and into her panda form against her will. When Tyler makes fun of her this time, she pounces on him from the roof, her mother arrives to see it unfold, and the party ends.
Right when we think Ming is going to yell at Mei, she accuses Mei’s friends of manipulating and taking advantage of her daughter to get tickets to see “those tacky delinquents.” She believes Mei is a good girl and can’t even imagine Mei make a decision her mother doesn’t approve of. Sadly, when given the opportunity to tell her mom what really happened, Mei chooses her mom’s approval over the truth and her friends.
The next weekend, Mirium, Priya, and Abby sadly arrive at the concert without their bestie, while Mei prepares for the ritual with her family as the red moon begins to shine. Mei is nervous, but everyone around her is excited for her to “banish the beast within and become her true self.” While getting ready, Mei is plagued with guilt for attacking Tyler, but is comforted by her dad. He shares about her mother’s panda and the fight she had had with Mei’s grandmother over her decision to marry Jin. He assures Mei that he likes all sides of her.
“People have all kinds of sides to them, Mei. Some sides are messy. The point isn’t to push the bad stuff away; it’s to make room for it, live with it.” —Jin Lee
Through a chalk circle on the ground and a Cantonese chant, the ritual brings Mei to a spirit realm where her family’s beloved ancestor Sun Yee reveals the way to separate her panda spirit from her human one. Mei painfully pushes past the deep connection she has with her panda in hopes to please her parents, but suddenly relives all her panda memories. She looks back at her panda and decides to keep it.
When she returns to the physical world in her panda form, her family tries to attempt the ritual again and Mei refuses. She simply wishes to go to the concert. The family tries to physically hold her back from abandoning the ritual, but Panda Mei escapes. In the struggle, Ming’s necklace containing her panda spirit is broken, releasing her monstrous panda, whom Ming does not have any control over.
“How could she do this to her own mother??” — Ming Lee
After a beautiful sequence of escape, Mei arrives at the concert and sincerely apologizes to Miriam, Priya, and Abby, mending their friendship. Mei assures them she is more than willing to risk being grounded to experience this concert with them. And 4*Town’s concert does not disappoint, but is aggressively interrupted by her mother in her panda form, which is practically the size of the stadium.
While the 4*Town fans evacuate and Mei’s family prepares for a mega version of the ritual, Panda Ming and Panda Mei begin fighting, arguing, and actually honestly communicating for the first time. Though much smaller than her, Panda Mei is able to deliver a final blow emotionally and physically when she declares she isn’t good enough and will never be like her mom. Her mom is knocked unconscious outside of the giant chalk circle she needs to be in for the ritual to happen.
To help her daughter, Mei’s grandmother and her aunties break their amulets containing their pandas. Together, while 4*Town and her best friends sing her favorite song, the panda family members pull her mother back into the circle. Once in the spirit realm, Mei meets a young version of her mother, who we learn struggles heavily with her self esteem, as you’ll see in the clip below.
All of Mei’s family leaves through the portal again, separating from their panda spirits, but Mei is firm in her decision to keep her panda. Her mother tries once more to get Mei to come with her, but realizes she is the one that has taught Mei to be so hard on herself and try to make everyone happy. Even if it separates them, this change is needed for their growth.
“Don’t hold back for anyone. The farther you go, the prouder I’ll be.” — Ming Lee
The movie ends with us seeing Mei being her true self, transforming in and out of her panda form, helping her family at the temple, and doing karaoke with her friends. Even though her mother is still new to the idea that Mei’s panda is her choice, she embraces this new dynamic and even invites Mei’s friends over for dinner for the first time.
“I’M 13– DEAL WITH IT!!”
This is honestly my favorite Disney movie at present. I don’t think I will be able to truly express my love for it accurately, but I will sure attempt to! This movie is so unique in so many ways, being the first of its kind its all-female directing team to its cute, rounded anime style. It’s not the first Disney movie (or Disney short) to talk about generational trauma (Encanto), have a focus on mother-daughter relationships (Brave), or have no real villain (Inside Out), but it is the first Disney movie to specifically talk about puberty by showing pads on screen and referring to the elevated lecherous feelings involved in having a crush.
This movie is all-around relatable for anyone who has ever been a tween girl. I have a hard time believing that at least parts of it aren’t relatable to everyone— whether that be going through puberty, being obsessed with a band, or experiencing that tough transition in your relationship with your parents (in between being snuggled in the nest and flying out on your own). We’ve all grown up and had formative embarrassing experiences. We’ve all been afraid and intrigued of what we had never experienced before. Many of us have parents who were a little too protective or at least kept a family secret from you for way too long. There’s gotta be something there for everyone!
For me, Mei’s commitment to her family was soooo Lil’ Gab (and honestly current Gab). There’s a sense of family pride that means different things to different members of the family and that can cause tension as much as connection. Color plays a huge role in this movie, blues and greens representing her mother’s side of the family while reds and pinks represent Mei. We see Mei lean into herself more and more throughout the movie instead of needing to be seen in the same light as her mother and family, but she still has specks of blue in the way that she still has a relationship with her family.
I also very much relate to feeling like parts of me aren’t understood or wanted by others. Mei wants to keep her panda, even though many of her family members find that decision to be some sort of disrespect to the family or betrayal of the status quo. As just-shower-thoughts on Tumblr once said, “Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people,” but man is that pressure heavy.
In my case, life is throwing me a lot of judgement and rejection at the moment, but I am so very thankful to have core friends and supportive family that I feel safe enough to process my feelings with. A couple years ago, my parents and I did family counseling and it was one of the best decisions we’ve made together. In the movie, Ming’s panda spirit had to be sealed into Mei’s Tamagotchi. For those who may not know, Tamagotchis are little virtual pets that require a lot of attention. So, Panda Ming (the passionate deep emotions of Ming) needed to be cared for by human Ming pretty consistently. I think this is a wonderful metaphor for Ming being aware of her inner child and taking care of her instead of completely locking her away. There is so much hope in our parents doing that work, which the older generations definitely need to do.
I can’t help but cling to so many quotes from this movie, as either being relatable or being something I want to hear more often. “My panda, my choice, Mom” is one quote that very obviously echoes the popular “my body, my choice” slogan of those fighting for women’s right to choose. I also love Mei’s mother saying that she truly sees Mei and telling her the farther she goes to find herself, the prouder Ming will be of her. That quote always makes me cry, because my life and my community often make me feel so limited with what I am allowed to be. I am currently dreaming of getting a tattoo that reflects that quote.
The movie has an overall theme of accepting yourself for who you are and surrounding yourself with positive supporters. It’s hard to know which voices are for you and which ones are for what they believe is the right version of you, but being brave enough to be yourself in front of others will give you a clear view. Mei knew right away there was a difference between changing into her panda form in front of her parents and her friends. But, because her parents love her, they listened to her and changed their minds.
“We’ve all got an inner beast. We’ve all got a messy, loud, weird part of ourselves hidden away and a lot of us never let it out. But I did. How about you?” — Meilin Lee
I’ll leave you all with a quote that I will hold close to my heart this week. Even though it just came across my Instagram feed, I have definitely already been living it.
🌻ART SHOW & TELL🌻
I don’t know if I have anything to show for this week. It was just a long, hard, busy week. Still working on my songs but want to keep those more under wraps. 😅
Time for some TLCCC💕
Treating myself to: blueberry muffin from Costco, what can I say?
Listening to: Inclusive Worship
Crafting: my imagination to hold feelings I am not ready to process yet
Craving: FREEDOM. And a Pina Colada.
Caring SO much about: Being with Oakley. Not wanting to be at this job any longer. I am sure part of my sickness this weekend was due to work stress
Love this piece and Turning Red! I definitely found so many aspects relatable, but I especially enjoyed how the film depicted female anger and the unfortunate shame around emotions. I am happy this film can teach children and adults alike the importance of feeling your feelings.